Mix-and-Match Haiku: Kissed

'Kissed': Is that rigor mortis or are you just happy to see me?To slake your thirst for Culture Snob poetry, as well as the interactive, I have crafted multiple options for haiku based on Lynne Stopkewich’s 1996 movie Kissed.

If you’ve never seen it or heard of it, I think you’ll get the gist pretty quickly. And if you’re a little rusty on the specifications of haiku, it’s a line of five syllables followed by a line of seven syllables and then another line of five.

Please offer finished poems — or more line alternatives — in the comments.

Line 1 or 3:

  • Necrophilia

  • Necrophiliac

  • Death no barrier

  • Cold, stiff ecstasy

  • Dead intimacy

  • Formaldehyde stink

  • Intimacy dead

  • They can’t feel a thing

  • Don’t come a-knockin’

  • Sex is a dead end

  • Dancing in panties

  • Sex is no dead end

  • Your beau’s crossing o’er

Line 2:

  • Molly Parker likes dead wood

  • If this coffin’s a-rockin’

  • Compulsion not a desire

  • Intimacy will survive

  • Rigor mortis is the key

  • I like the stiff, silent type

  • Funeral-home staff are sick!

  • I prefer a dead embrace

  • Speak! Please tell me you love me

  • Your beau needs to cross over

(Thanks to Bride of Culture Snob for the Deadwood pun.)

My contribution:

Intimacy will survive
Your beau’s crossing o’er.

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